


Oh, Such A Surprise

by Very_Anxious_Bean



Series: The Sides as Roommates [7]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Blood and Injury, Broken Bones, Deceit Sanders Angst, Deceit Sanders Has a Different Name, Deceit Sanders-centric, Gen, Guns, Gunshot Wounds, Hospitals, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Injured Deceit Sanders, Low-Key Suicidal Character, Morally Neutral Deceit Sanders, Near Death, Near Death Experiences, Shooting Guns, Swearing, This Isn't Too Graphic, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-27
Updated: 2019-08-27
Packaged: 2020-09-27 15:28:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20410051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Very_Anxious_Bean/pseuds/Very_Anxious_Bean
Summary: Eden was just trying to get home through a not-so-safe shortcut.





	Oh, Such A Surprise

**Author's Note:**

> Tags are the warnings, don't skip them. 
> 
> Eden is Deceit!

Eden wasn't wasted right now so he couldn't blame his dumb idea of "let's go through the alleys, that's going to be fine!" on the alcohol. It was weird since he was always drinking alcohol but he knew he should start cutting back on it, even though it's not really worth it. 

So here he was, in a troublesome situation with no way to contact the others. Perfect. 

Confused? Probably not since Eden's an idiot like the rest of his roommates (you'd think being one of the older ones, he'd learn) but let's go back a bit. 

Eden, for some reason, was walking around. He'd walk around for two hours, getting coffee and fucking around on his phone for half of it, and then decided to go home. Of course, he decided to go through the alleys because he was tired. 

It was noon and he didn't think much would happen but _no_, something had to happen. 

Eden gasped when the collar of his shirt was grabbed and he was yanked back, being forced into the shadows of the alley while a hand covered his mouth. He bit the man's palm, tasting blood a few seconds later. He just dropped some good coffee, there's no way Eden will let that go easily. 

The man hissed, pulling on Eden's hair to try to get him to let go of his palm. The man quickly stopped, feeling some of his skin break more. "Let go, you fucking bitch."

Some more men walked to them and Eden eyes them, wondering where the fuck they came from. 

"Let go," another man snarled. Eden was going to have to give them some nicknames soon. 

Eden glanced at them. So there was Noodle, Tattoo, Baldy, and Bloody Palm. Yay, now they've all got names. 

Baldy stomped over, grabbing Eden's throat and slamming him against the wall. 

Eden spat out the flesh that ripped off Bloody Palm's hand, glaring at Baldy. 

"Give me all your money and you'll be fine," Baldy growled. 

Eden glanced behind him, watching as Bloody Palm glowered. Eden spat out some blood and smiled lazily. "I'm broke, dude. I've got no money."

Baldy used his free hand to empty Eden's pockets, eventually finding his small wallet. He tossed it over his shoulder, letting Noodle go through it.

"There's a penny and a picture of a kid holding a snake in this thing. He really is broke," Noodle frowned. He held up the single penny, raising a thin eyebrow. 

"Yeah, I got that a few years ago. Never used it for some reason." Eden shrugged. 

Baldy narrowed his eyes at Eden, looming over him. "Give me anything valuable."

"You _just_ searched my pockets, the only thing valuable you don't have was that coffee you made me drop a few minutes ago." Eden deadpanned. 

"Your phone. Where is it?" 

Eden shrugged carelessly. 

"Do you have no self preservation?" 

"Not really," Eden admitted. It was true; Eden didn't care if he was in a life-or-death situation, he would still act the same if he wasn't about to die. Once there was a shooter in the area he and everyone else lived and he ran out, screaming for the killer to find him. Patton and Logan dragged him in. 

Okay, maybe that was a bit concerning but he's _fine_.

"Everyone has a phone, where's yours?" 

"What if I told you I don't have a phone?" Eden grinned. He squeaked when he was dragged away from the wall and pinned to the floor. 

"You're getting on our nerves, kid," Noodle snarled from above him. 

"Kid?" Eden frowned. 

"C'mon, the oldest you are is seventeen." Tattoo rolled his eyes.

"Do I _sound_ seventeen, you ass?" 

"Yeah. Now, just give us your shit and you can go running back to your parents." Bloody Palm said. 

Eden scoffed. He's too sober for this bullshit. "Just fuck off-" 

Tattoo stomped on Eden's diaphragm, knocking the air out of him. The others joined in, kicking and stomping on him. 

Eden was pulled up by his hair, coughing and struggling to breathe as Tattoo leaned down so they could be eye-to-eye. It wasn't wonderful when you're short and got beat up. 

"Guys, I found the kid's phone." Noodle said, picking up said phone from the floor. He turned it on, swiped up, and frowned at the pattern lock. "Unlock it, kid."

Eden hummed (and coughed immediately) and pretended to think. "Nah." He winced as his arm was bent incorrectly, on the verge of snapping. 

"One more chance before all hope is lost." The phone was held out. 

Eden sighed, grabbing it from Noodle. "I'll only unlock it if the dumbass here-" Eden nodded at Tattoo- "lets my arm be ore natural."

Baldy looked down at Eden, examining him before nodding at Tattoo. 

Eden's arm wasn't on the verge of breaking anymore. He swiped up on his phone, opening the camera and snapping a selfie with Tattoo before turning it off and throwing it at Noodle's head. 

Noodle stumbled when he was smacked with the phone. The sound of a bone breaking was heard and Eden grit his teeth. 

Eden was shoved to the floor and kicked at again. After that session was over (if his ribs weren't broken before, they sure were now), Bloody Palm aimed a gun at Eden. 

"We gave you a chance, kid." 

_Bang_. 

Back to the present. Eden was doing great, he was bleeding out more and more as time passed. 

Noodle had smashed his phone against the wall before the group ditched, somehow not catching the attention of anyone. Well, that was probably because no one was around here often. 

So yay, Eden's eyesight was blurring and his breathing was becoming more laboured as time passed. He would've gotten up if he could but the group broke his knee and shot him in the gut. 

Life was going great. 

Eden pressed harder against the wound, feeling the blood pour out. The bullet didn't exit but it didn't hit any arteries so Eden had, like, an hour.

Eden thought about his coffee that he was forced to drop before he blacked out. 

"I'm going to fucking kill him!" Virgil paced in front of the family in the waiting room. "I swear to god, he doesn't give a shit about what happens to him! I-" Virgil paused, looking at a woman- "thank you, by the way. What was your name again?" 

Said woman smiled gently, "I go by Hilly." 

"Well, thank you, Hilly," Virgil said before launching into a lecture. 

Patton bounced his leg as Logan leaned back in his chair. Remus was currently drawing with Roman, the two of them anxious. Thomas was now trying to get Virgil to calm down. 

"Sanders and the rest? _Again_." Emile walked over to them, letting his clipboard rest on his hips. "Nice to see you all again, maybe sometime we can meet outside the hospital."

"Is Dee okay?" Thomas asked, letting Virgil cling to his jacket's sleeve. 

"He nearly died but he should be fine. You all can visit in a few hours, we just have to make sure he's in the clear." 

"Oh, thank God." Patton breathed out. 

Logan exhaled heavily, "He's an idiot." 

Emile nodded, looking over his clipboard again. "I'll update you but I've got to get to my other patients." 

They all nodded and thanked the doctor. Emile smiled gently, saying something about the family being lucky in life before leaving. 

"I'm still going to kill Eden," Virgil growled as he sat down. 

"I'll help!" Remus grinned. 

"No, you won't." Roman said. 

The two glared at each other before Remus pulled Roman's hoodie over his head and ran for his life. Roman pulled the hood off and chased his twin.

Virgil watched them before saying, "I'll kill the three of them."

**Author's Note:**

> Guys, I literally could have died in two days. Thank god for medicine, right? 
> 
> Sorry this isn't the best but I wanted to get something out. Plus, I've been acting this out in bed rather than sleeping so I finally typed it!


End file.
